An End and a Beginning

I have watched the days soaring by...days even since I last sat down and typed a little.  I had peanut butter all over me, jelly in my hair, dish soap up my sleeve, dirty tissue in my pocket, and muddy ankles from wading in the backyard.  You'll understand why I wasn't able to type, of course!

It is time for a change.  For a few months now, writing here has become a burden.  It isn't because I don't want to, or because I have nothing to write to you.  God is revealing Himself almost daily, sometimes more to me as I dive into His word and into my circumstances.  The difficulty has come from the fact that the origins of my blog here stem from a desire to share the road I am on to encourage you fellow mothers out there.  You are mothers of 5, mothers that may have high schoolers, those in my family that show support, dog-lovers with maybe no children without fur, moms who work out of the home and in, moms who send their children to school and moms that keep their children at home for education.  So many backgrounds, and boy is it overwhelming!  I have enjoyed the thought of so much diversity sitting down at their screen to come together at the touch of my keyboard.  It honestly frightens me to think that a post of my ideas as a mom may somehow come across as a pat on my back and a level above what you are doing.  This conviction has finally weighted me down enough into a healthy change.  

God made this a big deal.  Because you chose to be a part of my ins and outs, the testimony of the walk we all do in this life.  We just do it a bit differently.  I am a writer in the depths, never realized this before I had Olivia.  

This is an end, an end to the blog here as you've followed.  I'm sad to close this part of the book!  I've questioned this over and over, should I or not.  My decision, though, comes with an excitement and zeal I've never experienced before!  As I type this to you, my brain is already full of fresh ideas for the newly prayed over preschooling momma's chapter I am surrounded by.  If you visit a blog site for the directed audience of something, you don't feel belittled when you read of innovations or things you have never thought of doing before.  There isn't this sense of "keeping up" with someone's life. I get pure enjoyment out of some wonderful writers out there, but have to limit myself to just a few.  If not, before a minute passes, I am comparing myself to see how I measure up.  In essence, I am not wanting any part of that.  For you as my reader.  By me as the writer.

For a couple of years now, I have had the honor of sticky fingers, time-outs, dressup outfits, wet kisses, beautiful artwork, and mud pies galore!  This not only from Olivia, but now with other children that cross the threshold into my home.  This is my life now.  I cannot begin to tell you what a relief it will be to be able to constantly type post after post relating to the preschool wonderland I am in!  And not feel a bit guilty that maybe you the reader don't have a preschooler or you don't stay home or you think a group preschool system is better.  It simply won't matter anymore.  This new blog will have a smaller audience, no doubt.  But my hopes are that God will use it to grow my faith and yours too if you have some sticky hands of your own at home!

So, I pray you'll stop by.  That you will read and discover, maybe cry with us.  I know you will laugh at us, that's a given!  

New blog:    Mudpieminds.blogspot.com

It has been an honor!

Love,

Laura

Naptime

I know if you have a little one, naptime is one of your prized times of day.  Not because you can't wait to get away from the dolls and questions, but because it can be a time of purpose or rest.  Today I would like to free up your naptime.

Make a to-do list but don't fret when it isn't checked off.  I am the world's worst for this.  I'm talking irritable!  There are some days that I just sit and stare at the window.  My glazed over moments. My thinking time.  There are some times that I am more than ready to jump on that treadmill and burn it up!  Then, there are those days that I have high expectations, but one child gets up crying or has to potty three times.  Or I jam my finger in the sewing machine.  No matter how you spend nap times, here are some things I have found that give me focus each week for these times:

-Think about the layout of your space.  Do you have a place that you can do "louder" activities if you need to?  Between the treadmill and sewing machine, my bonus room is very functional for this.  Maybe a garage could work for exercise or any other activity you might do.

-What requires concentration?  Do you have lesson plans, planners, write a blog;), write to others, reading, etc.?  As you probably have figured out on your own, naptime is a great chance to use complete quietness as a tool for the brain.

-Save the dirty dishes!  If you find yourself with a large to do list, don't use this precious hour or two for chores that could be done while the little one is sitting at the table doing artwork for goodness sakes!  My favorite time to clean the kitchen is during crafts at the table.  I can step over to help, chit chat as they work, and get the counter and sink cleaned all together.  

-Making a point.  Have we read our Bible today?  Adding a little dose of conviction for all of us mothers.  If the morning is not your time to jump into the Word, please use naptime.  So quiet the Holy Spirit may have time to say something!  I have learned a great deal when I have layed down my lists and calendars for the sake of Him.  Can't say I always make this choice, but oh, what we can learn!

Some humors here...oh and take the dog out BEFORE lay down time.  Ha!  He takes his nap with the girls too!  It couldn't be cuter or better.

For the Birds

It is so funny to see the way all these birds just appear out of nowhere the second I put seed in the feeders.  It's almost like a dog when you head toward the food bucket for their meal.  Or a little girl when you quietly open the bag of m&ms behind the pantry door....they must smell it!

My kitchen window is the only window that has no covering.  We don't have any houses behind us, only pasture and trees.  Any full-windowed glass would still need to be covered at night, in my opinion, but not the over-the-sink window.  I live in my kitchen at least half the day.  My table is there, my doggie goes outside there, the kids' plates pile up there, and of course the food is there!  The bird feeders are outside my window and can I just confess the birds have seen it all!

I am not sure how you feel about God knowing every thought and intention of our hearts.  Truth is, He does, no matter how we feel about that.  The closest earthly example for me hit me like a bag of birdseed yesterday.  As I was licking the spoon, very generously I might add, of the brownie batter before dropping it into the dishwater...I looked up to see a cardinal staring me down.  Like he knew my secret...ha! I see you!  

"Please mr. Cardinal, don't go to the next window over and tell my 4 year old!  I beg you!"

I have been in sheer gluttony, have been with my arms folded in anger, have been washing dishes with cracked hands but crazy peace on the inside, have been in tears pleading with God to make it through the day...ladies, where is your secret place?  The one where reality sets in?

God is there.  In our hidden moments, we can be assured He knows where we are and what we are doing.  We think we can hide, but his love overtakes all the boundaries we make, even if we never know it.  A place where we are honest, a place He can rescue us.  In studying creation of this world and how we all came into being, I am in awe of the ways He knows me, knows us.  He is walking with Adam and Eve.  And then, after their deceit, He is asking them how they know they have done wrong. Surely He already knew these answers!  He cares.  He cares about what we have to say, and He cares enough to bring us through things out to the other side.  The beauty I have found is that my life is never in secret with Him.  I may fool others around me, but not my Savior.  He lives in me, seeing the depth of my smiles and my wounds.  

I am never alone.

Just tell those birds to go tell all their friends...

Snickerdoodles

As he is affectionately known by our family...Marley has been with us for about 6 weeks now.  He is now officially a family member!  I have seen new puppy owner ups and downs, so I thought I would share some things I have learned so far.  If you are in the market for a furry addition, here are some considerations and tips for you!

-Take a long time to consider the breed.  Will it be full blood or mixed or a rescue?  Everyone has their reasons for each type.  For us, we had rescued our cat and frankly regretted this through the years with her aggressiveness.  Yes, of course it is better to rescue to keep these animals from being euthanized or going back to an abusive situation, but we also had to keep our "human" family top priority with our choice.  If your decision is to purchase from a breeder, what is the dollar amount you will pay?  Do they give any initial shots and how old will the puppy be when you get him?  All things to consider BEFORE you ever cuddle a furry friend...my point is, don't get attached before you have thought through some things.

-He will eat anything that fits in his mouth.  MUCH worse than a human baby...because he is much faster!  He grabs and runs:). At least a baby can't get away that fast!  Plan to get used to sticking your hand inside his mouth.  I'm not a classic "dog" person so this grossed me out at first!  I have grabbed hairbows, paper and even socks from halfway down his throat.  

-What size of a dog should you get?  All puppies start small...some smaller than others:). But consider him full grown.  After all, it only takes a year for a quadruple in size if the dog is supposed to be big.  Like they always say, they grow up fast!  

-Will he be indoors, outdoors or both?  Do you have an entry/exit door of your home that you can potty train him to every time?  Carpet, hardwood or tile?  Where will you put his crate if he is indoors?  His full grown crate, of course.

-Are there children in your home?  Will they be safe?  Will the dog be safe? 

-how will you transport the dog in the car?  Most folks choose a crate to start but that has to change as he grows if you have a large breed.  We are nearing this stage and hope to find a halter collar for the seatbelt soon.  I'm sure this will be loads of fun to have buckled in!

While there are plenty more questions to consider, I will stop here.  I hope you see the homework you may want to do before bringing your animal home.  Let me share a bit about my experience so far.  Remember, everyone's experience is unique, so yours will be different with your furry friend.  This is just to offer something for you to bounce off of.

Marley came home at 6 weeks old.  He was purchased from a breeder and slept all the way home in the backseat beside Olivia.  He looked so small in that crate... We placed the crate a couple different places when we got home until we got into the groove with the orientation we have now.  Yes, the crate he came home in is almost too small now!  A friend supplied us with the biggest crate I have ever seen...been tempted to see if me and the girls could all fit inside:).  We keep it out in the garage with a comforter over it.  If he is crated during daytime, we lift the comforter and leave the garage light on.  If it is night, he is covered and only uses a nightlight.  The garage is the second place we have tried him at night, after early morning barking in the bonus room was more than we could handle.  He doesn't bark at all now.  We think he was hot upstairs.

His breed is not pure.  He is goldendoodle.  His hair is long and fuzzy but little to no shedding.  Very minimal allergy risk.  He loves to play bite and we are working on that feverishly.  He loves the kids.  They are getting used to his ways and enjoy petting him and running outside:). I still get some anxiety when they are all playing together simply because of our past with Simba the cat.  I stay right there with them.  It is hard for me to get it in my mind that he actually WANTS to be loved on.  He is big for 12 weeks.  In just 4 weeks, he has doubled in size to 15 pounds.

Potty training.  Been less stressful after we got used to the hourly outdoor time!  He rarely has accidents, but when he has them, they come in multiples.  This is the part where I must say that potty training needs to happen quick and early.  This is very difficult if nobody is home all day.  I suppose eventually all dogs will be trained, but having him taken out all day helps to move the process to lightning speed!  Now, we know when to take him out and the signs of elimination.  Of course, we have lapses.  I suggest a towel for "mud" shoes at the door and a towel for the dog when the weather is nasty.  Get all towels ready BEFORE you go out each time.  This will save the carpet if you have it.

Maintenance.  We bathe him once a week, but I am sure this will change as he grows.  Give me time...I am not used to a dog in the house!  I want him to be bathed frequently for later too.  Hopefully he will not question bath time when he is as big as Olivia after having so many as a pup.  I brush him every other day and after his fur starts to dry after his bath.  Not something I particularly enjoy, but with poodle hair, I know it will tangle quickly.  This just helps him stay cleaner.  I tried the hair dryer, but you know how that went...

Best thing by far about him being here is that Olivia calls him her little brother!  They play for a straight hour running around the living room, her getting him to run through the princess tunnel and throwing his ball.  Her cheeks just blazing red afterward!  The hardest part has been the logistics for me.  When to crate him, when to let him roam.  It has been one of the biggest commitments I have ever engaged in outside of my child.  For example, I have found that it is best to let him first see all the girls when they are at the breakfast table each morning.  He gets his morning excitement out before they are down on his level.  Also, they get to do their puzzles and quiet time activities on the floor without him eating puzzle pieces and licking hair!  My commercial is that I recommend a goldendoodle for anyone who has children and needs a non shedding animal.  I will keep you posted as he gets bigger...surely I will learn plenty more and some things I have said here may change.  Happy cuddling your furbaby!

Substance Abuse

This is a different brand.  One that involves the very keys with which I am presently typing my life to you...I am learning about self-control.  That last fruit in the list from the Spirit.  The one that often gets left unaccounted for.  The one that us rule followers can minimize into utter denial in our own lives.

Here is how much I needed this.  I disabled the "chat" capability on Facebook because I was tired of the time between visits showing up on my screen.  Woven into my very simple life is this yearning to be with it keeping up with the world at my fingertips.  

Lately, I just. Can't. Stand. It.  

I am sharing what this does in my own life.  Please use your own judgement as to what it does in yours.  You may check Facebook every 5 minutes, maybe twice a week.  You may watch the news and have your tv on anytime you are home, maybe hardly ever.  Maybe you keep your music playing while you clean and do dishes or maybe you like to frequent sales sites online to see what you may get a bargain on.  Maybe you haven't ever heard of eBay...

You are likely a woman.  You are likely a mother, maybe a sister or a wife.  Whoever you are, rest assured you are precious.  I am thinking you have dear friends, who knows how many children, careers, seemingly unbreakable family bonds and material wealth at your fingertips.  We live a wonderful life.  A blessed one.  But, oh what God has taught me over this holiday season!  

I am not very independent.  Never have been.  My personality is woven into this very dependent lady, seeking the ways I can fulfill my dependency on others.  I am not saying this is a drawback at all, just sharing info about myself here.  I am dependent on my parents, my husband, my friends, my little world I have here.  I am dependent on my Lord Jesus.  I wanna lose all this.  My husband would be the  earthly exception here.  

All except Jesus.  Yes, I want to stay compassionate and stay loving.  I want to need them sometimes. We all desire to know we are needed and wanted.  Just not so dependent emotionally.  Not dependent on my keeping up with the world.  In the world but not of it... Such a Truth that can be difficult to remember in our tech society.  

When our wireless was out these passed few days, I felt naked.  I felt disconnected.  No cable and no internet.  No smartphone, just my good old free one.  What do I do at naptime when I usually spend treadmill time watching an episode of House Hunters?  I don't even have a radio upstairs, usually use my iPad.  How could I check the weather or the news or society's major communicator-social media?  How would I see the recipe for my bread for dinner?  Get out the recipe book??!!  What about those messages from the moms I do business with or friends?  Do they think I am just ignoring them? Frankly, I didn't know how I'd get through...isn't that sad?  Well, who knows what you are thinking now.   But, I made it!  And on the other side of my disconnect is MAJOR reconnect!

I started a book about the life of Saul-Paul a friend recommended while I had this break, in case you wondered about the treadmill...sure you did.  :)   I have learned more about this God-filled man and his transformation by Jesus than I had ever known.  And, to think I could have watched a design show instead...This is not a resolution, per say, just a major way that my eyes have been opened to how my life is run.  And WHAT runs it.  

My prayer for all of you and for myself is that Jesus will make these things happen-to show us what we need.  Even if it is frustrating.  I hope that He pushes us into a corner, respectively, so that we choose to dive into His Word instead.  

Thank you for hanging in this corner of the internet.  My deepest desire for this blog is to encourage.  Encourage in mom advice, my lessons learned so far, sharing what Jesus teaches me.  I have nothing but disgust thinking about adding to stress in a mother's life of how to "keep up" with being a "good" mom.  I am not trying to be your example.  Please don't put too much weight on my words.  I am a simple woman, saved by mercy from every rotten thing I think and do on a daily basis.  I am a mom who tries hard and frequently fails.  I am blessed beyond measure and am learning to let hard things transform me.  Most of all, Jesus loves me in spite of all this, as He does you.

A Little Bit

The hallway is so thick, I barely can get to the room at the end of the hall...a good problem, I always say.  Upon entering the room, many of these pre-kindergarten children will be leaving before my class arrives.

The "church swap" I call it.

Here they come!  One has on summer shoes with winter socks.  She loves it that way.  One has long hair that I can see she didn't let momma brush this morning.  She doesn't care.  A little boy still has breakfast leftovers on the corners of his lips.  Hey, at least he ate breakfast!  Yet, after playing some, singing some, we come sit for circle time.  And I. Love. It.  

"Criss-cross applesauce and put in your listening ears!"  We have an open Bible.  The inflection in my voice helps to bring the Words off the page.  One of them picks his nose.  A little girl won't stop playing with her tights.  Then, I exclaim, "Why was our Jesus who is God born in a stable, instead of a castle?!"  Silence.  

Well, He could have chosen any place.  He could have chosen a princess castle or a golden city or the middle of the marketplace.  As I look around at these children, I am brought to tears, seeing in them my own reflection of imperfection.  We NEEDED Him to be born that way.  So He could relate to me and you.  You may live in a castle though, I don't know.  He knows what it is like to be a King in a castle too though...

This last church day was an eye opener for me.  Not just my kids in class, but our teacher in the sanctuary.  He reminded us of the relation Jesus wants with us.  And how the comfort of that baby in a manger makes all the culture accept these "Jesus" songs and season.  What I couldn't get out of my head was that we are comfortable until He is God over our lives, an authority.  We don't want to accept that sometimes.  As mothers, we must let our kids see that we are GOOD with Him being in control.  We don't have it all lined up, they don't have to have it all just right.  

We can leave jelly on our shirt or a tangle in our hair every now and then.  

Merry Christmas to you! I pray that Jesus reveals so much to all of us about His love and necessity during this miracle season.  Help your family discover the wonder of it all by sharing the Christmas story from one of the gospels.  Messiah has come!

Wait

I know I am leaving you hanging...

My empty, white screen begs my attention.  When life is full of other things, good things, it seems like The Lord just clears my mind for those instead of my brief blog commentaries.  I will be back again, have no fear:). Enjoy this blessed season with friends and family, not forgetting about those that have little.  Can I just say, I am super excited for our girls trip to shop for our shoebox child on Friday...

But what about giving Jesus all the time?  With our attitudes, our hearts, our smiles, our time.  How is that possible, Laura, during this busy season when we are just trying to tread water??  

Be intentional. We have the authority over which activity we do and which to skip this time.  We have the choice how many gifts high we want the pile to be for our children.  We have the choice to get out of our beds each day, and wallow in our hurts or give them to Jesus by reading His Book and talking to him.  

Here's to hoping your season is not just merry and bright, but true and real and full of changing hearts!

Until the next time...